(freshrant.com)  Thousands of concerned Americans have gathered across in the nation’s parks, schools, churches and malls to beg Jesus to stop Governor Rick Perry of Texas from running for president of the United States.

After Perry told a group of East Texas business leaders in May, “it’s time to just hand it over to God and say ‘God, you’re gonna have to fix this…’ ”, groups have been gathering across America to fast and to pray to God, “You’re gonna have to fix Rick Perry.”

Large spontaneous gatherings and prayer vigils formed throughout the country to counter-demonstrate The Response prayer event organized by Perry in Houston’s Reliant Stadium.

Pastor Richard Colby, minister Church of the First Disciple in Peoria, Illinois, led prayers beseeching God “not to curse the nation with another cowboy governor from Texas.”

“This nation has already endured the blaspheme of eight insufferable years of famine from common sense and incomprehensible speech patterns.”   Pastor Colby said in front of several hundred of his congregation gathered for a prayer vigil, his voice visibly shaking.  “Dear Lord, deliver us from four more years of annoying Texas twang and phony cowboy chuckling.”

One of Governor Perry’s event organizers, a top official of the American Family Association, Bryan Fischer, has said Muslims should be not allowed to serve in the U.S. military and suggested Adolf Hitler and the German soldiers who carried out the Holocaust were gay, and their sexual orientation was the reason.   Another speaker,  Texas pastor, John Hagee, has suggested Hitler and the Holocaust were part of God’s plan to drive Jews from Europe.  Yet another speaker has called the Statue of Liberty “a demonic icon.”

But gay-bashing, Jew-hating reasons for the Holocaust are not the only causes Perry’s God Squad support.  They will “pray for our judges…the lawyers who will argue our position on natural marriage. May the Lord intervene to stop these efforts to homosexualize our nation – and to indoctrinate our children with evil!”

Zack Lind, an atheist and self-described anarchist, when asked why he was participating in an anti-Perry flash mob in an Oxnard, California mall, said, “I figure I’d better cover all my bases.  On the remote chance there is a God, I’d hate to think I didn’t do my part to stop another self-aggrandizing Texas-sized douche bag from becoming president of the United States.   So like, dude, God might bless America.”

Meanwhile, 63,500 Texans have yet to respond to The Response seats that still remain in Reliant Stadium.

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